FO: A wee small Eldritch Abomination

This is the very first thing I've crocheted that isn't a rectangle! It's not very good as such things go - certainly not on a par with my knitting - but I made a thing and I am proud.

I used the Cthulhu pattern from Creepy Cute Crochet to make this wee fella.

Surveying all that will one day be his.

Wee small wings.

With a one euro coin for comparison.

I used James C. Brett Supreme Soft and Gentle Baby DK, because I had reams of it over from a hat and I liked the colour. I also used a 2mm hook. The book recommended aran weight and a 3.5mm hook, and for those not into self-sabotage, I'm inclined to agree. I also think the eyes are a bit wonky - polymer clay or even googly eyes would have been better, he looks a bit insect-like as is. I feel a bit guilty about how it turned out as it's a present, but hopefully the fact that it is handmade with love AND the first such thing that I have handmade with love will trump its creepy bug-eyes.

Speaking of inadvertently creepy things, I made a Valentine's card for a friend with my left hand, with a view to it looking like a child had made it and being charming and adorable. The desired effect was not achieved.

All my attempts to show affection just come out terrifying :(

I may not be cut out for academia

I had this evening earmarked for asking a PI to apply for a personal grant with me, and catching up on my Coursera. It's a quarter to eleven, and so far I have flitted anxiously between social media sites, eaten all the chocolate I bought to fuel myself through the taxing process of writing a several-sentence email asking someone to invest time in me, and clicked 'Compose'.

Oh, and I've written everything you're read this far! So I feel like there's something to be said for that.

The problem with waiting this long is that my process of emailing people for a job involves writing a self-flagellating email about how great they are and how I don't deserve to work for them and apologising for even contacting them, and saying how it's perfectly understandable if they don't want to take me on, then paring away the grovelling until I sound like a functional, employable human. Unfortunately, the more I let it twist and turn in my mind the higher a level of apologies and self-deprecation I'm going to have to work down from. Currently, no-one will hire me from my first draft of an email because it will sound as though I'll spend all my time lying on the floor of the lab, wailing with self-loathing, not getting any work done and making people step across me.*

Dear Professor C,

I contacted you previously about the possibility of undertaking a PhD in your lab. As you may be aware, the deadline for the submission of applications to IRCSET is next month, and I was wondering if you would consider applying with me. I know you didn't reply to my email asking if it would help if I looked for personal grants elsewhere, and you probably would have contacted me if you wanted me in your lab and thought I had a chance of getting an IRCSET grant, and - oh. I see how it is. I'm sorry for wasting your time.

Best regards,

Jennifer

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Dear Professor C,

As you may know, the deadline for applying to IRCSET is next month. I probably wouldn't get it, but I thought you might like to apply with me. There's only one award though, and I hear the application is quite hefty, and I understand if you're busy. I'd be very enthusiastic about working in your lab, but it's perfectly fine if you'd rather not have me!

Looking forward to hearing from you, unless you're too busy, in which case I'll take your silence as a no, and also I made you a cake,

Jennifer

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Dear Professor C,

I really enjoyed my time in your lab before Christmas, and was wondering if you would consider applying for a personal grant with me. You won't even know I'm there, honestly. I won't even need a desk, I can just sit at a box in the corner. Of course, if you secretly think my work was terrible but are too nice to say so, I will completely understand.

All the best,

Jennifer

P.S. I'm not sure if you realised, but the Santa Hat I gave you as a Christmas thank-you was handmade. Just to say.

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Dear Professor C,

OH GOD, I'M SORRY, DON'T LOOK AT ME.

I look forward to hearing from you.

All the best,

Jennifer

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On the plus side, it's not too late to find a nice cave in  the woods and live off whatever squirrels I can trap. If I only trap the grey squirrels I'd be doing an ecological service, too. It's comforting to have a fall-back option.

*I am good at lab-work! I got a First in my thesis project, and it dragged my overall grade up to a First, and I am good at seeing how the literature connects together! I just worry about sounding arrogant in unsolicited emails, and so I throw myself wholeheartedly in the polar opposite direction.

A week (and a bit) of firsts and new things

I started in a new lab this week. I had to scramble a bit for a placement after Christmas, when the position I was meant to have fell through. For some reason I opted to learn Western Blot, about which I've heard nothing but bad things, over carrying out PCR, which I can already do and quite like. The appeal of doing something new was just too great, even if it makes me want to stab myself in the face.

As well as wet lab work, I'll be learning a bit of programming and helping out on a bioinformatics project. I've not done any of either before, so I'm looking forward to getting started on that!

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So far I have a lot of time at my desk reading papers and playing with Linux. I don't like being without something to do with my hands, so I've been getting some knitting done.

I finished my first pair of full-fingered gloves that I've been happy with. I've made one pair before, when I was starting off knitting, but they were a quite a poor fit, the gauge was wrong, and I wasn't happy with them. Worst, they were a present, and I'd told the person that part of their present would be late, so when they were finished it would have been awkward to opt not to give them. I suspect they have lived at the back of a shelf somewhere. I've avoided full-fingered gloves since then, but these ones turned out quite well, I think!

They are slightly too large for me, but they are for someone with larger hands than mine, so it should work out.  I used the Lace and Twist Gloves pattern (which is free if you click through the links and set up a Knitting Daily account), which is very straight-forward and gave me some new thoughts on thumb construction.  I used Debbie Bliss Rialto 4-Ply, which is quite perfect for this level of detail.

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Since finishing the gloves, I've been working on my first pair of toe-up socks, from a... book? book-box? a friend gave me last Christmas. I can be pretty lazy about fudging awkward techniques, so I'm proud of myself for actually taking the time to learn the magic cast-on. Most awkward thing in the world on DPNs, though.

Cables on variegated yarn - I am just a terrible person. I even have the temerity to quite like how it looks. These are going to be a birthday present for my mother. Her birthday is in April, but this is going to be my year of being disgustingly organised with my knitting.

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I started a climbing course this week, and really enjoyed it. It's quite different in terms of pay-off to everything else I do. If I want to be further along on a run, or on a piece of knitting, or while studying a topic, reaching that point requires sustained effort, passing through a number of other points on the way. If I want to be higher up on the wall, I put in a burst of effort, and then I'm higher up. I'm going again tomorrow, and really looking forward to it.

I'm also two weeks into a first aid course. The first week we learned to make normal and elevated slings, last week we learned CPR (which is some work, it must be said) and this week will be baby CPR and the Heimlich maneuvre. I'm doing it through St. John's ambulance, so I might look into volunteering with them afterwards, because free time is for losers and commies.

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This evening I started my first crochet project which isn't a rectangle - a teeny Cthulhu. I've finished the body, but the light was gone by that stage.

I'm using too small a crochet hook because Hickeys didn't have the one I needed, and I wanted to get started in case learning a slightly new technique took two weeks. The head is a little more finicky, and I ripped out my first one, but were I more adept I would have had it finished in a few hours.

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I'm only flying through my project list! I will think of new things and add to it soon.